Doin\’ the Butt (Drag)

Yesterday, the C-level officers of simpleprop.com met at a local undisclosed pizza place for lunch. Here we compared ourselves to the framers of the constitution (true), came up with a far-fetched embezzlement scheme to make us wildly rich (true), and talked about the strategic future of this here website (not true). We also talked about the butt drag. Read this. (Then come back.) Huh. In middle school, we had two weeks of

wrestling during gym class. I think this might have been an Austin thing, as one of the two gym teachers was also the wrestling coach. I hope so– those years were bad enough without having to climb on top of one of your same-sex classmates wearing just a t-shirt and shorts in the name of exercise. In addition, you were paired up with someone roughly your same weight. This makes sense, in general; however, when you\’re the second-to-most-overweight kid in the class and the most overweight kid is reeeeeally overweight.. well, let\’s just not go there, k? For me, the most remarkable is the quote from former Fresno State wrestling coach Dennis DeLiddo regarding the butt drag: \”I\’ve never heard this move used as being ugly or dirty.\” That\’s right, he doesn\’t think the practice of one wrestler sticking his fingers up the anus of another wrestler is ugly or dirty. I guess he showers a lot. Anyway, my point. I think \”butt drag\” is a rather uncreative name for this move. \”Checking the oil\” is much better, but I think we can top it. As such, I\’m announcing the Let\’s Come Up With A Better Name For When A Wrestler Sticks His Fingers Up Another Wrestler\’s Anus contest. Leave your entries in the comments section. The top name gets a free year-long subscription to simpleprop.com! Oh, and some dijon mustard.