Cold
- Wade
What's the one thing we do well here in Minnesota?
We bitch about the weather.
Why? Well, partially because it's low-hanging fruit, as far as banal conversation goes. But it's also partially due to how miserable it actually gets around here. Take today for example-- if you factor in the wind chill, the temperature approximately -6,245 degrees. That's brisk, baby.
As I'm too cold to think of anything creative, I'll fall back on one of my more recent creative crutches: the Google image search. Today's query: cold.
That there is JanICE the Cold Processing Bear. Apparently JanICE ensures that health nutrition supplements minimizes damage to nutrients from heat. I feel better now.
A French-ish looking man, apparently cold. Sacre bleu!
Cold sores. Sexy.
Niiiice facemuff. Perfect for below-zero weather, as well as knocking over liquor stores.
How can you not get excited about a movie described as "Animal House on ice"? Good lord-- it's a train wreck. Lee Majors? Willie Garson? You know that the two main reasons this movie made any money at all are here. When will Hollywood learn that you can't replicate the greatness of Ski School?
And my favorite:
That's right! A plush rhinovirus! Perfect for your kids at Christmas! I'm assuming that this is enlarged a bit. In fact, there's a whole website devoted to stuffed viruses. Including Gonorrhea! And Syphilis! Fun for the whole family!
I love the Internet.
What do you think? Drop us a line at webmaster@simpleprop.com and give us some
feedback. Maybe we'll even run your letters in future Gambits. 'The Daily Gambit' is updated every weekday.
