Movie Review - House of Wax
- Alex
Contrary to what television spots may have led you to believe, wax is in fact not forever.
I told a few people that I'd been to see this movie Saturday afternoon. The aggregate response seems to be "Ewww. Why?". That'd actually be a
fairly accurate review, come to think of it?
Let's start with the obvious flaw: one of the main character's names is Wade. Now seriously. Who names their kid Wade in real li-- I mean. Umm...
Nevermind. Next topic.
Yeah so anyway, the cast of characters are: Wade, the girl from "24" and "The Girl Next Door" (which is NOT to be confused with "The Hot Chick"),
her stupid brother and his stupid friend, a guy who looks like a dumber version of Cuba Gooding Jr., and Paris Hilton. Yes, that's how memorable the characters'
names are. In standard horror flick fashion they: go on a road trip, get lost, have one of their two cars break down, and spend the rest of the movie in
idiotic hijinks in a town that we come to find out is populated almost entirely by wax figures - including one building that is apparently entirely wax.
Have I mentioned yet that the movie is set in Florida? And that wax has a tendency to melt at warm temperatures? Yeah, that's about how believable this
movie is. Not even Paris Hilton's death can redeem it. I'll give it a bare minimum of credit for having one decent character (the stupid brother), but otherwise
this is a Trent-fest on par with the almighty legends such as Vertical Limit and XXX. We'll call it four and a half. Seriously.
What do you think? Drop us a line at webmaster@simpleprop.com and give us some
feedback. Maybe we'll even run your letters in future Gambits. 'The Daily Gambit' is updated every weekday.
