I'll Smack You In The Mouth, I'm Neil Diamond
- Wade
Okay, I'm not Neil Diamond. And I probably won't smack you in the mouth. Furthermore, I don't have many bizarre, insatiable, and downright dangerous sexual habits. So this gambit won't be very exciting.
I have a cold. Great timing. I leave for vacation tomorrow with the fam, and at this point the only thing that sounds entertaining is lying in my AmericInn bed the entire weekend. Which, I guess, isn't such a bad plan for a vacation. Anything to get away from here (meaning Dain) for a few days.
I've watched 0.2 seconds of the Republican National Convention, and even that was by accident. I thought NBC was showing True Lies but it was just the governor of Cal-i-for-nee-a waxing poetically about Richard Nixon. (!) To be fair, I didn't watch the Democratic convention either. It's all a little too Hitler youth rally-ish for me-- Democrat X or Republican Y comes on stage, spews whatever he/she is good at spewing, and the crowd cheers and applauds like the speaker just discovered the cure for, well, the common cold. Last night Dick Cheney could've stuck the microphone up to his butt, farted, walked offstage, and Madison Square Garden would have given him a 27-minute ovation. (Now, if he had farted "Old Susannah" or Ray Parker Jr's "Ghostbusters Theme", then the cheers would have been deserved.)
But I digress.
How can anyone get excited about this race yet? Dubya's lone policy stance is "we're turning the corner." Instead of disproving that, Kerry's sticking with his lone policy: "I'm not George Bush." I unfortunately must agree with my National Review when they say that Kerry truly hasn't presented a compelling case for being elected President this fall. I hope he does-- I'd hate to only be voting for him because i have to. Maybe the debates will help define the candidates more. It'll be fairly similar to the debates of 2000, I fear. While Gore looked wooden because of his personality, Kerry will look the same way because of the Botox. You can't lose a war of words to Dubya, can you? It doesn't seem like Bush has embettered his wordsmithing in the past four years.
Regardless... Neither Bushy or Kerry will decide this election. It'll be up to Ralph Nader again, who will suck enough votes away from Kerry to allow Dubya to get re-elected. I love politics. :-P
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