Too Much... Time on my Hands...
- Wade
No, I'm not paying homage to Styx. I'm referring to my current state. The details: wife and daughter in New York, dog in Austin, cat in Golden Valley, and I have the day off from work.
What do I do with this extra time? Do I catch up on reading? Finish some landscaping in the backyard? Or go channel-by-channel on my digital cable box and make notes of odd channels?
You guessed right.
With no more delay, here are the top five odd channels that I could really watch if I wanted to.
5. ShopNBC.com ShopNBC.com? I understand that it's the legitimate tv face of ShopNBC.com's empire. But isn't ".com" enough places?
4. CSPAN3 CSPAN broadcasts live from the House of Representatives. CSPAN2 broadcasts live from the Senate floor. What the hell is on CSPAN3? Dubya's ranch in Crawford? Cheney's underground bunker? Ashcroft's storage shed where he houses his collection of Brazilian animal porn?
3. Major Broadcasting Network Voted in because of a) its odd, generic name and b) when I flipped by it this morning the network was showing a "Gospel Video Countdown." I wasn't aware of one gospel video, much less enough gospel videos to necessitate a countdown. How much you want to bet that MBN plays more music videos than MTV?
2. Ovation Arts Network There's nothing like getting home after a long day of work, kicking off my shoes, and flipping on Madame Butterfly. Gawd.
1. Al Jazeera Are you kidding me? This is the same network that Osama Bin Laden uses for spreading new attack messages. Why is this being broadcast in the US? I'm sure Time Warner is bending over backwards in appeasing local Middle Easterners. But isn't this going a little far? I don't begrudge Muslims the right to watch a network that appeals to them-- but Al Jazeera?
Okay. Enough of this hard-hitting analysis. Back to the Game Show Network.
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feedback. Maybe we'll even run your letters in future Gambits. 'The Daily Gambit' is updated every weekday.
