Is Gout Relief Medication Sold in Bulk?
New Twins pitcher Mike Fetters is an advocate of Plyometrics. No, that isn't a new coating for KFC Hot Wings. Plyometrics is an exercise where a muscle is stretched, then contracted. I'm not certain why something so simple deserves its own four-syllable word. But, when you are a 250-lb "athlete," you take what you can get. Other noteworthy Fetter facts include his Hawaiian heritage and that he was once traded for a player whose first name is Duaner.
I have nothing against Fetters. Well, other than my fear that he may pull an Al Newman and accidentally eat a backup infielder (watch your step, Chris Gomez). My issue is that Fetters is the highest-profile signing this offseason for the A.L. Central champs. Beyond Fetters and Gomez, the Twins have inked Ben Ford, Kevin Hodges, Steve Lomasney, Everett Stull, Jose Cabrera, and Shane Andrews. I don't believe the plaque etchers in Cooperstown need to cancel their vacations because of this talent influx.
Is that so wrong? In their defense, the Twins re-signed several cogs from their 2002 edition, including Torii Hunter and Eddie Guardado. But, in light of their other additions, the team's actions show that they are happy with last year's model. Because their closest pursuer was 13.5 games behind, standing pat is understood. Yet incorrect, for two reasons.
That team who finished behind the Twins last year? The White Sox, who upgraded their team with several moves. In the bullpen, they replaced flameout Keith Foulke with fireballer Billy Koch. Bartolo Colon takes the rotation slot held by Rocky Biddle, a move I call the Rocky-Colon enhancement. GM Kenny Williams also added Brian Daubach, Tom Gordon, and Sandy Alomar, Jr. These last additions don't just mean that the Sox' trainers won't be bored in 2003-- they also provide playoff experience and veteran leadership.
Second, the Twins have some holes in their lineup. Their corner infielders, a traditional source of power, combined for 25 homeruns last year. David Ortiz, in the lineup only for his bat, hit 20. (While this is not a measly total, it's a middle-infielder total in this performance enhancement era.) Another starting pitcher is in order-- although the rotation is a strong point, no one can stay healthy for an entire season. Despite the team's success last year, there were holes to fill.
So we add Kevin Hodges and Shane Andrews. Everett Stull? That's enough to drive a man to drink. I wonder if drinking a bottle of beer qualifies as a Plyometric exercise?
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